Staying away

Edward Cullen (Twilight) told Bella that he doesn't have the strength to stay away from her anymore (in the movie).
Staying away, I thought. Staying away...is hard when my heart is pining. But I know being alone is the best way out right now.

Speaking of 'away', I felt I was nearly blown off from my feet while sitting at the Singapore River earlier on. I was already swaying while sitting on the concrete seats. I decided to quickly put my writing back in my bag and hurried off before everything get blown away.

Getting outta the house on a weekend alone needs more courage and determination than I thought of.
As soon as the black clouds got combed over, I decided to take a quick bath and get ready before I change my mind.
I took longer than I should to really get outta the house.

Before I got outta the house, I scooped I-weekly for some quick ideas on where to go. Museum is an easy choice and by far, comfortable with lone ranger.
I scanned through the recommended list and I didn't feel like going to one that I need to pay.

There is only 1 free exhibition in National Museum and the other slightly more interesting one is the Asian Civilisation Museum.
I lingered on the latter thinking whether if I should go at all. (Of cos' this one, I have to pay.)
I had been there twice and they were both with Jason.

I am not sure if I could NOT get lost inside myself and actually going to museums with dim lighting ALONE, is kinda goose bumping. Even with Jason, I kinda had mini goose bumps here and there (Especially at the Chinese part. There were scary...erm..figurines.)when I was there.

(Ps: I still bump face to face with that scary figurines TWICE in the end and it made me stopped dead at my tracks for 3 seconds, TWICE!!!)

But still I willed myself to go ahead with it. It couldn't be that bad and surely I am more than capable myself to handle a small museum with 11 galleries only.
I am pretty sure that I can do it.

I made sure I was dressed in some sort of arty farty style before I stepped out. The right dress code sets the right mood.
Half way on the bus trip, my determination starts eroding and I wonder should I just go home.

Lucky for you, I didn't.



Here's the pictures.

This is a spot that I secretly sighed. Was it even real?

Before I show the rest of the pictures, I have to emphasize that some may be kinda~~goosebumpy.
I dunno, maybe it is just me. I wasn't freaked when I was there but then again, museum just has this kinda after effect. Especially those old photos.

Enjoy;)


I read that ACM is holding this Neither East Nor West exhibition. It kinda interests me so I went there. Only that I didn't expect it is just a small gallery.
Oh, if you are counting on me to relate what is history and what's the whole thing about. Forget it,ok?
This is the third time that I am there and I barely read those descriptions. I did alot more this time round but I forgot everything by now.

A closer look. I actually really like this shot.

Then I took some pictures of the photos.
I regret not taking Queen Victoria's. I didn't know she was so....erm..husky.

But this is the very first picture that I saw from the magazine before I decided to visit ACM.






Giving you a closer look now. Suck your breath!






I took a very close look while I was there. It didn't look as goosebumpy as I thought. I thought they were rather pleasant looking actually. I only remembered one of their names. Princess Sophia (That's easy for me to rem) and Princess...something.

I briefly glanced through the caption. It said something like they were brave for women of that era and very close to Queen Victoria, and something about paying taxes like commoners.
-Shrugged- I told you I am not good with reading and then remembering.





Now this is again the lady in the intro picture of this gallery. For a reason, I thought she looked very great in that pose, that outfit. It exudes a very strong,independent yet a lil' lonely and gentle feel.

At least this is something that I can feel strong enough to take a few photos of this same photo.
More than enough to give you goosebump again.




Ok,maybe no goosebumps.

Anna & the King. The KING,himself.

I was lucky that when I went in this gallery, a guide with a small 'troop' of British came in as well. So I overhead some explanations from the guide, tuning out most of them though.
But I wouldn't know that the above portriat was the Siam king himself(from Anna & the King) and I also heard that people in the past don't smile when their photos are taken.

Reason behind that is that it was perceived as rudeness to smile when taking photos.
I guess that is why you don't see people flashing their pearlies like that weird cat in Alice in the Wonderland, in those black and white photos era.

Hmmm..weird logic. Not even grinning.

I didn't proceed to take other photo of those photos. You wouldn't know half of them and seriously, none of them actually smile. So why freak myself?

Last few photos of that gallery.

I was trying one of those shots again. When I took this photo, that angmoh (yes,he's an angmoh) turned back upon noticing the flashlight.

I stucked my tongue out in embarrassement. I hope he doesn't think I was checking out his back profile. It ain't that gorgeous and I am not interested in SHORT (just merely my height) guys' profile, back especially.

I ducked out and proceed to another gallery.

On the way.

Then I bumped to another memory spot. These were with Jason.

We were there.

I stopped here,sitting down for a rest. This spot carries memories that trapped my feet there. While sitting there, appearing to watch the projector show ( I already spaced out by then), another ang moh came by and sit by me.
He sat there for sometime, appearing to watch the show as well. I really wondered if he was really watching. I seriously doubt anyone ever stop by to sit there and watch the show.
He left and I still sat stone there.

I was just somewhat relishing on those days actually. Funny how some part of the memories can make you feel. Relishing on the that very feeling when I was standing there.
A very acquired kinda feeling, I would say.

But I too, have a weird feeling that it is not gonna be the same today. I just have to sigh. Is this what I have lost to time? Change. What a major change I've suddenly seen in myself. Like I don't even know why and how and really, since when?





I enlarged this picture on purpose.

Did you see that faint red circle I drew on the photo? This is one hella goosebumpy sia! My body cringed with minor shock when I saw this photo as I uploaded it to my pc.
It took me a second to realise that it is JUST the picture of the curtain. Still disturbing at the first sight though.

As I relived this mini scared feel, I feel de ja-vu. I think this is not the first time for me. I got the same shock when I was there with Jason.

We were there, a photo taking spot.





I rushed down to find this spot. It is still there except the surrrounding changes a little.

Well...We were there too, holding each other @ this spot when the photo was taken by the self timer.

We were happier.

I glided through the rest of the galleries effortlessly. (Of cos, I wasn't even reading much)
Last few photos taken @ ACM.

Buddha's most famous lines in mortal world.

Haven - Junction of sacred and profane.

Profane - –adjective
1.
characterized by irreverence or contempt for God or sacred principles or things; irreligious.
2.
not devoted to holy or religious purposes; unconsecrated; secular (opposed to sacred ).
3.
unholy; heathen; pagan: profane rites.
4.
not initiated into religious rites or mysteries, as persons.
5.
common or vulgar.

Hmm...Chim. Haven is neutral and to be neutral, you might as well become air particles. It is afterall, easier to take sides.

I walked out,satisfied.

I stumbled along the Art House quite coincidentally. I swear I wasn't even looking for it nor know where it actually is.

There was nothing much there. I wondered why can't I entered 'The Screening Room'. I supposed I would see more photos there and I swear I saw a man opening the door just like that and went in.
I should have follow but instead, I went in the ladies for vanity sake. (T_____T)
When I wanted to go in, I almost pulled down the door. It's locked!
I don't understand.

There was really nothing much spectacular there except for a very nice chill out cafe. I was pretty hungry by then but I decided better not to go in.
First concern was the pricing. They do not have a menu laid outside. I don't want to go in paying more than I'd expect.
Second concern was the ordering style. The layout seems really random and casual. No servers were walking about or standing to serve. I just don't wanna make a fool outta myself inside.



I walked back to Esplanade and decided to have my meal at the Passion cafe in the library.


The lady serving me was calling me 'Love'. I was initially delighed to hear this kinda ang moh greeting(oh,I think she's from the States. Black american but not that black.) in Singapore but as she continued, her 'love' doesn't sounds like she has got any 'love' in her voice.
I almost rolled my eyes the third time I heard 'love' coming from her.

Love,shouldn't sound like that.

The hours seem to stretch by when you are alone. I felt like I had doodled alot of time off but it was a mere 4-5 hours? While I went to Suntec, I started to feel lonely.Decided to head home still.

Being alone..feels lonely of cos. But it is still better than feeling not natural. I guess I just need some practice with that and really, lonely is more welcome by me than most other kinda feelings.

I am pretty good with handling solitude.

It is just me that you can't handle.